4 Most-Asked Questions About Sex

The mysteries and doubts about sex that plague the average man and woman run a wide-ranging gamut. But there are some that today's sex counselors hear more often than others. Here they are, along with the answers!

1. Is masturbation harmful?

This one, of course, tops the list. From acne to insanity, from impotence to memory loss - hardly any ailment in the medical encyclopedia has not been blamed on masturbation! Until the inception of the 20th century, even the physicians fell in line and prescribed "cures" ranging from leeches to suck out blood from the genitals, to "cages" in which children's penises could be padlocked by parents and the key thrown away.

This was in the West. In India, although the amorous ancients joyously documented their masturbatory postures for posterity - the temples of Halebid in Karnataka flaunt masturbating males among their erotic carvings - the majority of Indian youth is tortured by crippling fears about the effects of masturbation on body and mind.

The fact is that no minister or medico has ever provided a shred of evidence to suggest that masturbation is harmful. To the contrary, current opinion among enlightened sexologists is that masturbation is not only not harmful, but it may also be distinctly beneficial. To demolish the more common myths:

The penis has no muscles; hence there is no way that masturbation can lead to 'weaknesses.

Masturbation does not deplete the body's supply of semen, leading to a scarcity situation. Semen is produced every day - and it's produced to be used! As sexologist comments, "It is disuse, not use, that leads to atrophy."

Masturbation does not impair sexual intercourse or sexual pleasure. In fact, there is growing evidence that lack of masturbatory experience may lead to problems like impotence and anorgasmia (difficulty in experiencing intense orgasm). Masturbation is the ultimate source of sexual self-awareness and forms an important part of many sex therapy programs.

Sexologists, however, do caution that masturbation may indicate some other underlying problem if it is indulged in compulsively and to the exclusion of other sexual outlets even when available.

2. What can I do to increase the size of my penis?

That question is best answered by another: Why do you want to? Most men feel that they'd be Olympic performers in bed if only their penises were "a little" longer or a little broader... Although there are wide variations in the size of penises in the flaccid state, erection is said to be the great equalizer because penises that are small in the non-erect state enlarge proportionately more than penises that are longer or broader in the non-erect state. And of course, the size of the flaccid penis is irrelevant to sexual performance!

What's more, even during erection, not more than 5cm of penile length is necessary or for reproductive purposes. The outer one-third (i.e. about 5 cm) of the vagina has the most concentrated nerve ending, and this is the portion that is sensitive to the thrusting penis. As for reproduction, man only needs enough penis to be able to deliver the semen into the vagina - from there on, the sperm speed upward with a momentum of their own!

3. Is oral sex dirty and perverted?

Oral sex brings the tongue, lips, and mouth into play in the genital area, and in that sense brings an added dimension to sexual activity: all the senses are now involved. In those who are at ease with it, it can heighten arousal, providing the final surge of excitement leading to intercourse; it can even directly bring on orgasm.

But not everybody is comfortable with oral sex; guilt and awkwardness are felt even by several of those who indulge in it. One reason for considering it 'dirty' is that most people are conditioned to think of the genitals themselves are dirty. But, from a scientific point of view, oral sex is no more unhygienic than mouth to mouth kissing.

Some people are put off by the genital odors, or the genital secretions. But the secretions themselves are relatively clean, and the odors partly reflect the kind of foods that the person eats. And, a good bath before engaging in oral sex should ensure cleanliness.

Nobody has yet been able to come up with a valid reason why oral sex is dirty or unhealthy or perverted. The feeling persists among many, and the most worrying thing about oral sex is the worry it causes.

4. How can I make sex more satisfying?

Make sure you are with the right partner. Someone, you're comfortable with and care about. Emotions are an important part of the sexual experience.

Not over-tired or under stress. Both are poor starting points for good sex.

Not plagued by fears about sex itself. This mainly applies to women - and the fears range from the fear of pain to the fear of pregnancy. Inhibitions or anxiety are instant passion-poopers.

Ready to experiment and to innovate. Different positions, different places, even different roles (alternating between aggressor and passive partner) bring in the variety that puts the spice into sex.

Tips To Giving A Good Blowjob

When we hear about lack of libido in a relationship, usually we assume it is a problem of females. The truth is men account for about over 30% of total low libido cases. As a lady, you still can do something to defeat his decrease sex drives. Men (same as women) adore oral sex. If you want a means to get him wild in bed, here are the suggestions on oral sex you can commence.

·       Get him cleaned up

Whether receiving or giving oral sex, both have to be comfortable. This will not be possible if either one of you has a bad smell. It will be great if your man cleans himself first. It will be excellent if you both can have a bath together.

·       Keep yourself in a comfort zone

If you are not in a relaxed lovemaking position, you will not be able to give him a nice blowjob. If he is standing or sitting, giving you a lot of space for movement, you can kneel on a pillow or sit on a seat

·       Feel the neighboring areas

You can give him a cat bath (kissing him all over) and use your hands to "molest" his medial thighs, perineum, and testicles (the area between the anus and genitals) which are all erogenous zones to get him into the mood slowly. To increase the excitement, you can use your fingertips to tickle behind the testes.

·       Start licking him

You start by warming the tip of his genitals with your breath. There are a few sensitive areas of the male genitals for you to take note. The tip of the genitals is highly sensitive than the shaft, especially the ring around the head. The underside is sensitive than the side especially in the area proximal to the tip (known as the frenulum). To be effective, you have to focus your licking effort on these erogenous points.

·       Take his genitals into your mouth

After playing with the head, you slide your mouth down the shaft while placing your fingers at the base of his genitals (to create a ring). This will prevent you from getting choked if you unexpectedly take in too much of his "ice-cream stick." You should take in one-third to half of the shaft of his "ice-cream stick". With your teeth behind your lips, you compress your lips against his shaft as you slide up and down along his semi-erected manhood. Do this gently at times, relishing the sexual pleasure of your action, and then picking up the pace.

·       Alternating between tongue and mouth actions

Once in a while, you can switch back to using your tongue to lick on his frenulum and tip. You can experiment with the diverse types of licks on these two areas apparently by changing the shape or movement of your tongue. To give him more extreme pleasure, you can also twist your neck right and left so that it feels like your mouth is spinning on his penis.

·       Applying your hands

If you want to arouse him more during oral sex, you can do so by applying your hands. Using your hands also open the chance of stimulating his testicles and perineum while you keep giving him oral sexual stimulation on his "ice-cream stick.".

·       Blowing cold and hot

Oral sex can be fun if you can savor it up by playing with temperature and excitements. You take a sip of warm water, You then gargle it and swallow. Next, you take his penis into your mouth for twenty seconds then put an ice-cube in your mouth before taking in his male organ. You continue the blowjob. The variations in cold and hot will feel perfect for him.  The warmth of your mouth combined with the occasional flashes of chilliness will have him on his feet.

·       Do not ignore other areas

The scrotum and testicles are extremely sensitive areas that can drive him wild when you lick on his testicles and gently pull his scrotum down.

·       Bringing him to climax

You should never be compelled to let him ejaculate in your mouth. It is your choice and is defined by your level of comfort about it. He should not think any less of you about your preference. You can resume the hand stroking through his orgasm.

Too much masturbation?

Most men are aware of the fact that masturbation is an act that almost every man gets involved in from time to time. The fact is that masturbation brings many benefits in addition to the good feeling. For instance, masturbation can help guys learn how their body is functioning, but it can also improve the health of their penis. It can help you to lasting longer in bed. However, there are situations when men may need to lower the frequency of this activity. Of course, this can be difficult for some men who are used to masturbate very frequently.

As we have mentioned before, there is nothing abnormal with masturbation. Almost every guy masturbates at some period in their life and the majority of men masturbate regularly through the adulthood. But, what if you think that you are masturbating too much? Frequent masturbation can lead to penis soreness. Reduce in frequency of masturbation can give you the biggest erection ever during proper sexual intercourse. So, what can men do to prevent masturbation when their penis is already erected?

Avoid porn

Now here’s an obvious suggestion. In case you don’t want to play with your fully erected penis, you should definitely stay away from things that will support erection. These activities can cause an erection if you don’t have one too. So, stay away from porn movie and video clips when you want to reduce the frequency of masturbation.

Make a schedule

Well, this advice may not seem exciting, but it is definitely effective. It would be best if you come up with a plan that will limit the amount of time you spend on this activity. In case you are masturbating for 30 minutes a day, start masturbating to 15 minutes every second day.

Change your sleep pattern

The latest surveys have shown that there are a huge number of men who like to masturbate in their beds. In most cases they want to do this before falling asleep or when they get up with a morning excitement. In case you want to keep this need for masturbation under full control, you should limit the time you use in the bedroom. Namely, try using your bedroom just for sleeping and don’t stay in it longer than necessary. In addition, when you are already in bed try to sleep on the left or right side, not on the stomach or back. If you do this, you will avoid situations when your penis is rubbing against pillows and sheets. This is another thing that leads to arousal. If you have problems sleeping, try meditation or some breathing exercises. Don’t use masturbation as a technique that helps you fall asleep faster.

Get involved in other activities

Make a plan to try some new things instead of masturbation. For instance, you can get involved in sports activities like playing basketball, rollerblading, running etc. You can also take gym classes in your local gym or take long walks. Don’t forget that physical activity releases the same hormones as sex, so you will feel great all the time.

Masturbation is a completely normal thing, but if you are doing it too frequently it’s time to take some actions.